Post by werebobwildpants on Jan 31, 2010 3:37:22 GMT -5
Yes, I'm rewriting it. I just hate the way I wrote it, because I turned everyone into Mary Sues. I apologize, I won't fail you all again! I'm reassigning roles: after days of thinking, I figured it would be funny and cute to make Kermit the Dorothy-like role, if that's okay. PEACHES AND TOBE: YOU GUYS ARE STILL IN! DON'T WORREH!!
_____________________________________
Chapter 1: the Black Hole.
Kermit the Frog (now clothed in jacket, pants, shirt, scarf, etc.) took part of the action in the midst of a great, crazy asylum called the School of Spandy. There was Peaches, the ninja lover; GG, the Doctor Who enthusiast; Pixie, the SpongeBob stalker; M, the Muppet expert, and many other great and sweet people. On his way to the school, Pepe the King Prawn decided to tag along on the way to school. He felt uneasy and unsure as he and the frog walked toward the school. ''Kermit, I am not sure about this, h'okay? These people are CRAZY, h'okay!'' he jittered in his thick Mexican accent. Kermit smiled down at him. ''Aw, don't be such a shrimp.'' he laughed. ''It's extremely fun, and everyone's extremely nice to us. What could be better?'' Pepe rolled his eyes. ''If ju believe that this is a great place, I believe that JU are out of jour mind, h'okay!'' he warned. Kermit shook his head. ''Whatever. C'mon, we're gonna be late.'' They opened the doors to the school and walked in. Pepe was looking around fearfully. ''H'okay, if you see any ninjas and Chinese girls with their hair in buns, RUN H'OKAY!'' he yelled. Kermit shook his head once more. The two Muppets climbed down the hall to Room 18, and stopped. An odd looking girl with the appearance of a robot sat on the doorstep, looking up through the skylight. Kermit stared at her confusedly. ''Uh... GG, what're you doing?''he asked. GG didn't look at him. Pepe and Kermit exchanged glances. GG's face tensed up a little. She looked at Kermit as if she was deathly afraid of him. She got up and grabbed Pepe and Kermit and pulled them into the room. ''I told you they are crazy, h'okay!'' screamed Pepe. GG put them down. Both of their faces tensed up as a massive blackhole erupted from a purple backpack. ''SWEET MARY!'' Pepe instantly fainted. Kermit gasped and stood there like a statue. ''Kermit! Pepe! Over here!'' came a racous voice from the croud of worried students and sea creatures. A girl and a boy stood on either side of the room. The girl had her hair tied up on the back of her head with a Ramsey hoodie. The other was extremely tall, had hair covering one of his eyes, a long green scarf, and a Kermit hat to top it off. Kermit ran over as fast as possible for a frog. ''Quick, you need to go into the blackhole shelter!'' cried the teacher, Miss Stape. Kermit nodded frantically. ''R-Right!'' everyone, including Kermit, rushed out of the window as the black hole drew closer and closer. Kermit was about to step in, but he froze. ''Wait! I forgot Pepe!'' he yelled. M grabbed his arm. ''He's just a SHRIMP!'' Kermit pulled away frustratedly. ''He's not a shrimp, he's a KING PRAWN!'' Kermit ran back to his fainted friend and grabbed him. But before he could go back, the school was lifting up off the ground. The two fell to the floor. ''ACK! H-Hold on, Pepe!'' yelled the frog as the school spun out of control. Things were whirring and swirling around the room at the speed of sound. Pepe woke up and glared at Kermit. ''I TOLD YOU SOMETHING WAS GONNA HAPPENS, H'OKAY!'' he shrieked, Kermit felt like his brain was going to explode from the air pressure and Pepe's frantic panicking and screaming. His life was flashing before his eyes. Birth; Childhood; Adolescense; and worst of all, Miss Piggy. There was a large THUD and a howl of pain, then his vision began to grow darker and darker until he fell to the floor with a crash and an incoherent mumble.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 2: Spand-Oz
''H-Hello? Young frog, please do wake up...'' came an angelic voice as Kermit's vision came to. He sat up on the emerald green grass and slapped a palm to his head. ''Ugh, my head...'' he mumbled, unamused by the events that had occured. He looked up at the people before him and stood up. Right in front of him stood a beautiful woman with bright blue hair. She looked like an amalgam of human and pixie, but he couldn't tell. Surrounding her were square, sponge-like little creatures with large cerulean eyes. They cowered behind the witch's dress. Pepe walked up to the witch out of nowhere. ''Aaaah, si. Ju know, if ju are looking for a wizard to rule by jour side, witch... Pepe can be of assistance, h'okay...'' Pepe sighed, attempting to seduce the witch. The witch pushed him away with a roll of her eyes. She smiled down at Kermit, who was utterly amazed by the beautiful city around him. ''Hello, Kermit the Frog. I am Glinda, the Good Witch of the North, and you are in the world of Spand-Oz...'' she replied to his bewilderment. Kermit hopped to his feet. ''You don't look like a witch... you're so young and pretty.'' he wondered, staring into her eyes. She giigled and blushed. ''Thank you dear... then again, we really should be thanking YOU for what YOU'VE done!'' she laughed. The sponge creatures walked past Kermit, and to the school that sat on the ground. They were high-fiving and cheering and laughing; Kermit really wasn't sure as to why they were doing so. He walked over and yelped a little. Underneath the school sat a pair of feet, clad with silver sneakers. Pepe was walking around in the background with his iPhone held high. ''Hm... no service here?'' Kermit tugged at the collar of his sweater nervously. ''D-D-Did I do that?'' he asked timidly. Glinda glided over to him. ''Apparently, your giant building struck the final blow to my ''east coast sister'', the Wicked Witch of the East.'' she explained. ''For years she has enslaved us Spongekins, but now that you and your King Prawn friend came along, that's all over now...'' said a bearded Spongekin, with a deep mighty voice. Another Spongekin came up to Kermit. ''The silver sneakers she wore are now yours.'' the female Spongekin explained. Glinda took the shoes from her sister's feet (soon after, they vanished under the school) and shook the dust out of them. ''You must put them on, Kermit. You are now Spand-Oz's only hope.'' she warned sadly. Pepe stepped up indignantly. ''Oh what, no shoes for me h'okay?!'' he growled. Glinda glared at him. ''Tough luck, shrimpy!'' she hissed, smacking Pepe harshly on the cheek. Kermit slipped on the sneakers in amazement as he wiggled his feet. ''Not a bad fit, for an amphibian...'' he said smiling brightly. Glinda pushed Kermit lightly toward her. ''These shoes have special powers in store for you. But be careful of the west, because if my Wicked sister sees you with the shoes... she'll pry them away from you.'' Glinda warned. Before the frog and prawn could protest, Glinda came close to the two of them and kissed them both on the top of their heads. ''With my kiss, you will be protected from the witch... In order to stay on the right path, follow the yellow pore road. So long for now!...'' ''W-Wait!'' called Kermit. Glind turned around. ''Will we ever be able to get back home?'' he asked worriedly. The kindly woman nodded her head. ''Yes... you must visit the Wizard of Spand-Oz in Bikini City... you have to hurry Kermit! My time her is fading... a... way...'' Glinda and her spongy companions faded abruptly. The two Muppets shrugged and hesitantly walked on the road. ''Kermit, she may have given JU protection, but I can tell she wanted me by that kiss, h'okay!'' he reassured himself. Kermit patted Pepe's head jovially and they continued on the road. A Spongekin reappeared. He walked up to Pepe and slipped a whistle in his pocket. ''What are ju...?'' The Spongekin winked and vanished with a pop.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 3: The Rescue of the Scarecrow
Kermit and Pepe were talking conversely as they walked down the road. ''H'okay, so what if ju don't survive, h'okay? Does that mean I get to be head Muppet, h'okay?'' Pepe yearned hopefully. ''No. If we don't come back alive, I'm gonna let either Gonzo or Fozzie be in control, I guess.'' he wondered. ''L-Let's not think about that.'' he stuttered. Pepe nodded and directed his attention to a corn field. He nudged Kermit in the elbow. ''I dunno 'out ju, but I'm gonna get some corns, h'okay!'' said Pepe eagerly. Kermit shrugged and walked into the field along with Pepe. Pepe climbed up a stalk and began nibbling on an ear of corn. A scarecrow stood nearby on a pole with a frantic look on his face as a crow picked at his green scarf covered neck. ''Would you mind getting off of me?'' the straw boy growled. The crow cawed twice and pecked harder at his neck. ''OW!! H-hey! Stop it!! That freaking hurts!!'' Kermit turned around and gaped at the scarecrow. He didn't like what he saw. Kermit grabbed a rock and chucked it at the crow, ending its breif life. The scarecrow watched it twitch on the ground. ''Are you okay?'' asked the frog. Scarecrow looked dazed. The one eye he had that was visible stared wide eyed. ''What? Oh, you meant me. It's a good thing you showed up when you did, cause I was gonna come off of this stupid old pole and... yeah thanks I owe you one. Name's Scarecrow.'' Scarecrow stuck out his hand forcefully and Kermit shook it. ''I'm Kermit. Kermit the Frog.'' he explained. ''Si, si, and I am Pepe the King Prawn, but you can call me anything you want, h'okay...'' sighed Pepe, obviously confusing Scarecrow for a girl because of his shaggy brown hair. Scarecrow scrutinized Pepe. ''Uh, I'm a dude...'' he mumbled. The prawn blushed nervously. ''Oh... sorry, h'okay...'' he apologized. Scarecrow nodded. ''Yeah, I'd laugh but the pain from this pole up my back is killing me. I'm the worst scarecrow ever... but what am I supposed to do? Find the Rainbow Connection and call it a day?'' he moped. Kermit shrugged. ''Well, I know alot about finding the Rainbow Connection. And you'll never find it stuck up on that pole. Here I'll get you down.'' Kermit climbed up a corn stalk and unfastened the strings on Scarecrow's arms. The boy fell to the ground with a thud, causing one of his arms to flop off. Pepe gasped and fell off of the stalk he was holding onto. Kermit picked it up and reaattached it to the straw boy. ''You are a mess, you know that?!'' he laughed as he helped the boy up. Scarecrow shook off the dust from the pollen on the ground and chuckled. ''Well, it would be easier if I only had a brain. All that's up in the old noggin is a pile of straw. I wish I knew... well... could know of... well... I just wish there was someone who could give me a brain!'' said the frustrated Scarecrow, trying to avoid the word 'know'. ''Hmmm...'' wondered Kermit. Pepe intervened. ''Oh no! We are NOT going to pick up every Tom, Jim, and Carlos we see on the road h'okay! This journey is about ju going home and me getting LOTS of monies h'okay!'' Scarecrow snorted. ''Please... my name is SCARECROW, not Tom, Jim, or Carlos.'' he huffed. Pepe rolled his eyes. ''See what I mean, h'okay?!'' Pepe hissed. Kermit shook his head. ''Aw c'mon, the poor child needs a brain! You want him to end up like Peaches?'' Kermit asked pleadingly. Pepe looked scared. ''Oh GOSH no, h'okay!'' Kermit nodded. He walked up to Scarecrow. ''Hey Scarecrow, if you come with us to the Wizard of Spand-Oz, I bet he can give you a brain.'' the frog suggested. Scarecrow's painted mouth rose into a smile. ''Really? If I had a brain... I wouldn't be an idiot! And I could do something that helps people!'' he cheered. Kermit smilled and giggled. ''Yeah! All we gotta do is go to Bikini City!'' Scarecrow's eyes... er, eye, lit up. ''You mean it's NAMED AFTER A SWIMSUIT?!?! Huh! I like it already!'' he exclaimed. Scarecrow followed after Kermit and Pepe continued walking down the road, with a smile that could light up the world.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 4: the Rescue of the Tin Woodsgirl
The three of them were still walking down the road. Kermit looked up to the towering Scarecrow. ''So Scarecrow... how did you end up on that stalk?'' he asked. Scarecrow shrugged and frowned. ''I've been up there for thirteen years. I was hung up thirteen years ago and the farmer forgot about me and left me there for my straw to rot.'' He held up a piece of straw from his hat that had turned a nasty brownish color for Kermit to see. ''See?'' Pepe grimaced and shook his head. ''So basically ju are like some type pf corpse made of straw, h'okay?'' he asked. Scarecrow shrugged again. ''I dunno. No brain, remember.'' he said flatly. Pepe looked over at Kermit. ''Do ju HAVE to pick up every deadbeats you see on the streets, h'okay?!'' Before Kermit could answer, a loud groaning sound came erupting from deep in the woods. Pepe jumped into Scarecrow's arms. Lost in confusion, Scarecrow dropped him abruptly. Kermit walked a little closer towards the woods. ''I think its coming from over here...'' he mumbled beckoning them to follow him. Scarecrow followed the little frog into the woods with Pepe clinging to one of his long, lanky legs. They walked around through the brush until they came across a sillohuete. It looked like a girl from their point of view, but it was impossible to tell. Kermit crept over to the sillohueted figure and brushed some dust off of its legs. ''TW...'' he muttered, repeating the two initials engraved on the leg. Scarecrow stepped forward. ''Wonder what that means...'' he mouthed. The figure started to groan and move a little. Kermit stepped back. Scarecrow put his hands on Kermit's shoulders as Pepe clung harder to Scarecrow's leg for dear life. An oilcan glinted in the sun peeking through the trees. Kermit picked it up. He glanced at Scarecrow, who just shrugged. Kermit shook nervously and began to oil the joints he saw around the mouth of the metallic person. The lips creaked and moved slowly. The head then turned along with the neck and limbs as the frog oiled them up. Surprisingly, the thing made of tin resembled GG in a weird sort of way. ''Whew... thanks frogman.'' she finally answered to him. Kermit shook her hand lightly as the two stepped closer. The tin one looked up at the Scarecrow. ''Hey, you kinda look like Jack Skellington...'' she wondered. Scarecrow raised an eyebrow. ''Anywho, name's TW... Whoa! That Scarecrow has a shrimp on his leg! Sweet!'' she cried. Pepe raised his head. ''King prawn...'' he stammered. Scarecrow pryed him off. ''So what's your name, ma'am?'' asked Kermit. ''TW. Stands for Tin Woodsgirl. You?'' ''I'm Kermit the Frog, this is Pepe the King Prawn, and this is Scarecrow.'' he answered. TW sighed sadly. ''Wow, you've got friends. I wish I had some friends or somethin'.'' TW longed. Pepe stepped forward. ''Ju don't have no friends? Weirdo...'' he scoffed. Kermit stamped Pepe's foot, causing him to yelp. ''Why don't you have any friends?'' he asked. TW sighed once more. ''I don't have a heart. Y'see, I'm a robot, and robots don't have hearts to love.'' she answered. Scarecrow let out an 'awww' and Pepe just went 'pffft'. Kermit held her cold hard hand. ''Well, Scarecrow's looking for brains, and Pepe and I just wanna go home... we're gonna see the Wizard of Spand-Oz!'' he told her with a bright happy smile. ''Maybe he can give ya a heart?'' Scarecrow intervened. TW computed the thought with her accelerated robot brain. ''Alright... I guess I'm with ya!'' Before Kermit could do his famous YAAAAAY!!, a dastardly moan erupted from the trees. Their branches turned into hands and arms and the grew angry, gnarled faces. Pepe started panicking. ''SWEET MARY!!!''
___________________________________________________
Chapter 5: When Trees Attack
The trees began to violently shake their branches, pelting the group with apples. ''But I'm allergic to the apple-fruits, h'okay!!'' Pepe wailed, covering his face. Scarecrow threw himself over the other three to protect them. Kermit removed his hands from his eyes. ''Scarecrow! You're hurting yourself, stop it!'' he worried. Scarecrow shot him a reassuring smirk. ''You kidding? My body's made of straw! This don't hurt at all!'' he beamed. As an apple flew past his head, Scarecrow's smile disappeared. He nudged Pepe. ''Pepe, climb up to my head and unfasten the string around it, then hand it to me.'' he commanded. ''JU WANT ME TO TAKE OFF JOUR HEAD?!?!'' Pepe shrilled. Scarecrow glared at him wildly. ''Just do it!!!'' Pepe climbed up the Scarecrow and unfastened the string that held his head to his straw body. He handed the scarecrow's head to its body. Scarecrow stopped protecting them and stepped back, with his head LITERALLY in his hands. ''What'sa matter? Don't wanna LOSE YOUR HEAD!!'' He threw his head at a tree, knocking it out. The body scrambled over to pick up the head. Scarecrow attempted to roll. ''Over here, stupid!'' he insulted the body. It picked his head up and fastened it back on. Kermit's lip twitched. ''Now THAT'S creepy...'' he murmurred in a hoarse voice. The tree Scarecrow had hit sprang back up and nailed him in the head with a banjo that it shook out of its leaves. Scarecrow went flying through the air and landed on Pepe. Kermit grabbed the banjo and tuned it. "I think I know what I gotta do!" Kermit said, mustering up all his might. He grabbed the banjo in one hand and started running at the trees, yelling the Indian's signature WOLOOLOOLOOOLOOO!!! As soon as Kermit was about to hit the tree, he stopped in thin air and started playing the Rainbow Connection. The trees fell silent and watched him for a minute, only to grab the banjo and break it in half. Kermit stepped back, shaking. ''I-I guess you didn't like that one, eheheh... RUN!!'' Kermit ran back screaming. TW lept into the air with her axe as a tree shot a fiddle from its branches. Pepe's eyes widened. ''WHAT KIND OF GOD FORSAKEN TREES ARE THESE, H'OKAY?!'' he yelled. Scarecrow picked up the fiddle and started playing in a hicktown country style as TW blew the trees to smithereens. Wood was flying everywhere as she got at them. Sap flew through the air like fresh blood on a battlefield. Kermit watched in awe until Scarecrow grabbed him by the shoulder, rodeo style. ''Spin around, put on a show! Nothin' gets ya pumpin' like a rodeo! Take some names and show some CLASS! Cut the trees and kick some-'' ''BUTT!'' interrupted Kermit. Scarecrow shrugged and kept playing. The combination of axes and fiddles was beautiful. The bow slid lightly across the last string as TW demolished her last victim. A branch inadverdently nailed Pepe in the head. Kermit was smacked square in the gut with an apple. In order to retalliate, Scarecrow threw his fiddle at the tree, causing it to explode. ''WHOO!'' TW cheered throwing Pepe in the air, leaving him screaming until he came back down. Scarecrow high-fived her. ''Now THAT'S what I call a hoedown! YEAAAHHHH!!!'' he trilled joyfully. Kermit sighed in relief. ''Well THAT'S taken care of. Let's get back on the road...'' he suggested, pointing to the road. TW and Scarecrow shrugged and followed after the Muppet. Pepe came along also. As they were walking, Scarecrow smelled something foul. He crinkled his painted nose and covered it. ''Whoo wee! Who cut the d**n cheese?! I mean BARNACLES that reeks!'' he complained. Kermit stared at her blankly and blinked. Scarecrow looked as if he was rolling his eyes; hard to tell considering no one could actually SEE ONE OF THEM. ''Don't give me that look Kermit! It couldn't have been me or TW, we ain't even human!'' Pepe blushed and twiddled his thumbs. ''Sorry... I TOLD ju I was allergic to the apple fruits, h'okay...''
___________________________________________________
Chapter 6: the Cowardly Lioness
The road began to get uneven and hard as they walked along. Scarecrow fell through gaps in the road several times, causing everyone else to rescue him and stitch him back together. But they didn't seem to mind. Kermit's flippered feet grew tired and achey through the silver Converses on his feet. ''Man, my feet are KILLING me. I gotta relax...'' he muttered. ''Yeah...'' said everyone else in unison. They walked for at least fifteen more minutes until they came to a forest full of abandoned logs. They all found one long enough for all of them and plopped down. Kermit unlaced the shoes and moved his flippers around a little. ''Okay, they can make a talking scarecrow, a tin woodsgirl, and a trailer land on a witch but they CAN'T make a comfortable magic sneaker? Go figure.'' said TW. Kermit nodded agreeingly. ''I feel you on that.'' Pepe scooted over on the log, sitting on something furry. ''Ow!'' cried out a female voice. Everyone looked around. ''D'you guys hear that?'' asked TW. Pepe rose into the air on an orange tail. ''Err, guys...'' he trembled. A lioness showed her face from behind the treee. She looked strikingly like Peaches, except for her feline features. ''AAAH! It's a SHRIMP!'' she cried. Pepe leaned in closer. ''No, prawn.'' he corrected. ''Oh, prawn... AAHHHHHH! PRAAAAAAAAWN!!!'' the lioness screamed. Pepe was still clinging to her tail as it was waved around frantically. Everyone watched as the lioness's tail carried around the screaming prawn. Scarecrow nudged them to get up. Kermit growled and held up one of his shoes warningly. ''Get your tail off my prawn!'' he threatened. The lion stopped and threw Pepe onto TW, knocking her off the log. The female lion hid behind a tree. ''Please don't hurt me! I'll be good, I promise!'' she squealed. TW got up and scoffed. ''Well look at you! Queen of the Beasts, and you've got the moxie of a pillbug!'' she laughed. Scarecrow nudged her. ''TW, don't be rude.'' he said through gritted teeth. Kermit walked up to the lioness. ''What's your name?'' he asked kindly. She hid even farther behind the tree. ''L-L-Lion...'' she cowered, now looking Kermit full in the face. Lion was relived when she found it he was just a cute green frog. ''Sorry, I just don't have too much courage in me...'' she replied sadly. Kermit frowned. He showed pity for the lioness. ''Aww, don't feel bad...'' he replied stroking her paw. Scarecrow walked over. ''Yeah! So what if you're not so brave? I'm not so smart!" he reassured her. TW nodded. ''Yeah, and I've got so little heart I could cry.'' Pepe nodded also. ''Si, and I'm so mindblowingly sexy it hurts.'' he said beating his chest a little. Lion raised an eyebrow. Kermit leaned over to her ear. ''Don't believe him, he's just a king prawn.'' he whispered. ''Do we call him king?'' she whispered back. Scarecrow nodded 'no'. ''But back to the matter at hand,'' interupted TW. Kermit agreed by nodding. ''Lion, we're going to the Wizard of Spand-Oz to ask for help, would you like to come and get some bravery?'' asked Scarecrow, reassuredly holding her hand. Lion pulled away. ''Your hands are all strawy and scratchy... but I guess I'll go! Even though it's kind of frightening.'' she answered. TW laughed. ''Then it's settled! We're back on the road!" Everyone but Kermit left the log and continued. He heaved an exhausted sigh and laced up the shoes as he followed his other cohorts.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 7: On the Road Again!
Over last night, they had traveled far. Of course they stopped to eat and to sleep for the, but this particular night would sure be eventful for Kermit and friends. All of them were walking for about an hour when they came to a hault at a great wide log. The log crossed a dangerous waterfall and linked to the forest across. Kermit frowned. ''What do we do now? Cross it?'' he suggested. Before they could answer, the frog was already balancing himself on the log and walking across. Everyone was shouting 'no!' and 'you won't make it!' or 'come on back!'. Scarecrow just shot him a worried look. ''Be careful, Kermit!'' he called. The little green frog stepped down and landed safely on the land on the other side. ''YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!'' yelled Kermit as he flailed his arms around. ''C'mon Pepe!'' Pepe shrugged and scuttled across the log in a few seconds long. It was easy for him because he had four arms and two legs. TW patted Scarecrow on the back. ''Okay, you go next StrawBoy.'' she joked. He nodded and balanced on the log. After a few shaky steps and catching himself from behind, he made it with TW right behind him. As soon as they reached the other side, everyone high-fived. Lion stepped back a little. She was so afraid to fall off that she was frozen with fear. Kermit stood on Scarecrow's shoulders. ''C'mon Lion, you can do this!'' he reassured her. Lion gulped and began walking slowly on the log. After a few creaks from the log she stopped halfway. Lion clung to her tail. ''Guys I can't do this! I can't move!''she panicked. Everyone continued cheering her on, but she wouldn't budge. TW stepped onto the log. ''I'm going out. If I don't come back, tell Doctor Who I love him!'' she yelled over the rapids. TW neared the timid lion. ''Don't be afraid. We'll take this one step at a time! Now let go of your tail and grabmy hand.'' she soothed to the lion. Lion slowly dropped her tail and clutched the tin girl's cold hard hand. TW led her across the log with a few soothing words and soon enough, they made it through! There was cheering and laughing and arm flailing and random things exploding! Scarecrow and Pepe were launched into the air by one of the random explosions, but no one really cared. As they were about to continue on the road they heard jazz music erupting from... something... Lion pointed over to a brightly lit building surrounded by poppies of red and gold hues and tinges. ''It's coming from over there. Come on!'' Lion said. All of them crept carefully into the building to find out that the building was a nightclub! There were people sleeping on tables and drinks overturned at bars. A band similar to the SpongeBob gang was playing jazz and scat music. An usher pulled them to a table and sat them down. The table had a large vase of poppies in the middle of it. Scarecrow looked around. ''Y'know, if I had a brain I could find out why it's fun to get all drunk and tipsy at a nightclub.'' he stated randomly. TW raised an antennae from the top of her head like an internet signal finder. ''According to my databases, these poppies make people fall asleep, appparently forever if not taken away from the poppies.'' she informed them. ''Pssh.'' scoffed Lion. ''How could a stupid little flower-ZZZZZZ....'' And she fell to the floor in a daze. Scarecrow and TW exchanged shocked glances. TW got down on the floor and nudged the lion repeatedly. ''Lion? Lion?!" she screamed frantically. She got back up and sat down with a frightened gaze. Kermit yawned and waved his hand absentmindedly. ''Eh... he's fine... y'know what?... We should just stay here...'' Kermit yawned again. ''Where it's so... relaxing!...'' He fell to the floor, sleeping. Scarecrow nudged Kermit repeatedly and nervously. ''Kermit? Kermit! KERMIT?!?! WHY WON'T HE WAKE UP?!'' he cried panic-stricken. TW just repeated 'I don't know' over and over to his questions. Pepe stumbled in holding a toilet roll. ''The bathrooms here are so comfortables, h'okay...'' And Pepe fell asleep also. Scarecrow got up. ''It's the poppies!'' Scarecrow realized. TW and he were not affected because they are made artificially not of human (or in this case frog and prawn) flesh and blood, of course. C'mon let's get Pepe out of here!'' Scarecrow told TW. Both of them grabbed one side of Pepe and carried him away. As they got out of the club, they dropped Pepe on the grass. ''What do we do now?'' asked TW. Scarecrow shrugged. ''I don't know! But we can't get Kermit and Lion out of there!'' TW looked confused. ''Wait, we can get Kermit out of there, he's only like two feet tall and few ounces of felt.'' she corrected. Scarecrow looked around and whispered to TW. ''Yes, I'm aware of that, except that the readers of this cruddy story want drama, and besides, we gotta go by the book.'' he told her as he looked out at YOU; the reader. TW nodded and understood. Pepe aroused himself barely. He pulled Scarecrow close to him as if he were drunk. ''Listen to me, h'okay... there's this whistle... in my... pocket. Take it and... blow.. it... h'okay...'' Pepe explained, swaying side to side as he gave Scarecrow the whistle. He shrugged and puffed on the whistle. The sound of a thousand tiny feet came rampaging in. The old Spongekin with the beard who had given Pepe the whistle stepped forward. ''What is wrong?'' he asked. ''Lion and Kermit are trapped in there! Poppy exposure!'' TW cried. The Spongekins went in two shakes of a lamb's tail and came out with Kermit and Lion in their arms. They all giggled shrilly and dissappeared with a pop. Kermit woke up finally. ''Oh... what happened?'' he asked groggily. TW and Scarecrow smiled at each other. ''Nothing.'' they said in unison. Lion awoke with smacking her lips. ''What'd I miss?'' she took one glance at Pepe. ''AHH! PRAWN!'' And Lion fainted again. TW busted out laughing while everyone else shook their heads. They got away from the club as fast as possible, vowing to never set foot in it ever again.
___________________________________________________
_____________________________________
Chapter 1: the Black Hole.
Kermit the Frog (now clothed in jacket, pants, shirt, scarf, etc.) took part of the action in the midst of a great, crazy asylum called the School of Spandy. There was Peaches, the ninja lover; GG, the Doctor Who enthusiast; Pixie, the SpongeBob stalker; M, the Muppet expert, and many other great and sweet people. On his way to the school, Pepe the King Prawn decided to tag along on the way to school. He felt uneasy and unsure as he and the frog walked toward the school. ''Kermit, I am not sure about this, h'okay? These people are CRAZY, h'okay!'' he jittered in his thick Mexican accent. Kermit smiled down at him. ''Aw, don't be such a shrimp.'' he laughed. ''It's extremely fun, and everyone's extremely nice to us. What could be better?'' Pepe rolled his eyes. ''If ju believe that this is a great place, I believe that JU are out of jour mind, h'okay!'' he warned. Kermit shook his head. ''Whatever. C'mon, we're gonna be late.'' They opened the doors to the school and walked in. Pepe was looking around fearfully. ''H'okay, if you see any ninjas and Chinese girls with their hair in buns, RUN H'OKAY!'' he yelled. Kermit shook his head once more. The two Muppets climbed down the hall to Room 18, and stopped. An odd looking girl with the appearance of a robot sat on the doorstep, looking up through the skylight. Kermit stared at her confusedly. ''Uh... GG, what're you doing?''he asked. GG didn't look at him. Pepe and Kermit exchanged glances. GG's face tensed up a little. She looked at Kermit as if she was deathly afraid of him. She got up and grabbed Pepe and Kermit and pulled them into the room. ''I told you they are crazy, h'okay!'' screamed Pepe. GG put them down. Both of their faces tensed up as a massive blackhole erupted from a purple backpack. ''SWEET MARY!'' Pepe instantly fainted. Kermit gasped and stood there like a statue. ''Kermit! Pepe! Over here!'' came a racous voice from the croud of worried students and sea creatures. A girl and a boy stood on either side of the room. The girl had her hair tied up on the back of her head with a Ramsey hoodie. The other was extremely tall, had hair covering one of his eyes, a long green scarf, and a Kermit hat to top it off. Kermit ran over as fast as possible for a frog. ''Quick, you need to go into the blackhole shelter!'' cried the teacher, Miss Stape. Kermit nodded frantically. ''R-Right!'' everyone, including Kermit, rushed out of the window as the black hole drew closer and closer. Kermit was about to step in, but he froze. ''Wait! I forgot Pepe!'' he yelled. M grabbed his arm. ''He's just a SHRIMP!'' Kermit pulled away frustratedly. ''He's not a shrimp, he's a KING PRAWN!'' Kermit ran back to his fainted friend and grabbed him. But before he could go back, the school was lifting up off the ground. The two fell to the floor. ''ACK! H-Hold on, Pepe!'' yelled the frog as the school spun out of control. Things were whirring and swirling around the room at the speed of sound. Pepe woke up and glared at Kermit. ''I TOLD YOU SOMETHING WAS GONNA HAPPENS, H'OKAY!'' he shrieked, Kermit felt like his brain was going to explode from the air pressure and Pepe's frantic panicking and screaming. His life was flashing before his eyes. Birth; Childhood; Adolescense; and worst of all, Miss Piggy. There was a large THUD and a howl of pain, then his vision began to grow darker and darker until he fell to the floor with a crash and an incoherent mumble.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 2: Spand-Oz
''H-Hello? Young frog, please do wake up...'' came an angelic voice as Kermit's vision came to. He sat up on the emerald green grass and slapped a palm to his head. ''Ugh, my head...'' he mumbled, unamused by the events that had occured. He looked up at the people before him and stood up. Right in front of him stood a beautiful woman with bright blue hair. She looked like an amalgam of human and pixie, but he couldn't tell. Surrounding her were square, sponge-like little creatures with large cerulean eyes. They cowered behind the witch's dress. Pepe walked up to the witch out of nowhere. ''Aaaah, si. Ju know, if ju are looking for a wizard to rule by jour side, witch... Pepe can be of assistance, h'okay...'' Pepe sighed, attempting to seduce the witch. The witch pushed him away with a roll of her eyes. She smiled down at Kermit, who was utterly amazed by the beautiful city around him. ''Hello, Kermit the Frog. I am Glinda, the Good Witch of the North, and you are in the world of Spand-Oz...'' she replied to his bewilderment. Kermit hopped to his feet. ''You don't look like a witch... you're so young and pretty.'' he wondered, staring into her eyes. She giigled and blushed. ''Thank you dear... then again, we really should be thanking YOU for what YOU'VE done!'' she laughed. The sponge creatures walked past Kermit, and to the school that sat on the ground. They were high-fiving and cheering and laughing; Kermit really wasn't sure as to why they were doing so. He walked over and yelped a little. Underneath the school sat a pair of feet, clad with silver sneakers. Pepe was walking around in the background with his iPhone held high. ''Hm... no service here?'' Kermit tugged at the collar of his sweater nervously. ''D-D-Did I do that?'' he asked timidly. Glinda glided over to him. ''Apparently, your giant building struck the final blow to my ''east coast sister'', the Wicked Witch of the East.'' she explained. ''For years she has enslaved us Spongekins, but now that you and your King Prawn friend came along, that's all over now...'' said a bearded Spongekin, with a deep mighty voice. Another Spongekin came up to Kermit. ''The silver sneakers she wore are now yours.'' the female Spongekin explained. Glinda took the shoes from her sister's feet (soon after, they vanished under the school) and shook the dust out of them. ''You must put them on, Kermit. You are now Spand-Oz's only hope.'' she warned sadly. Pepe stepped up indignantly. ''Oh what, no shoes for me h'okay?!'' he growled. Glinda glared at him. ''Tough luck, shrimpy!'' she hissed, smacking Pepe harshly on the cheek. Kermit slipped on the sneakers in amazement as he wiggled his feet. ''Not a bad fit, for an amphibian...'' he said smiling brightly. Glinda pushed Kermit lightly toward her. ''These shoes have special powers in store for you. But be careful of the west, because if my Wicked sister sees you with the shoes... she'll pry them away from you.'' Glinda warned. Before the frog and prawn could protest, Glinda came close to the two of them and kissed them both on the top of their heads. ''With my kiss, you will be protected from the witch... In order to stay on the right path, follow the yellow pore road. So long for now!...'' ''W-Wait!'' called Kermit. Glind turned around. ''Will we ever be able to get back home?'' he asked worriedly. The kindly woman nodded her head. ''Yes... you must visit the Wizard of Spand-Oz in Bikini City... you have to hurry Kermit! My time her is fading... a... way...'' Glinda and her spongy companions faded abruptly. The two Muppets shrugged and hesitantly walked on the road. ''Kermit, she may have given JU protection, but I can tell she wanted me by that kiss, h'okay!'' he reassured himself. Kermit patted Pepe's head jovially and they continued on the road. A Spongekin reappeared. He walked up to Pepe and slipped a whistle in his pocket. ''What are ju...?'' The Spongekin winked and vanished with a pop.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 3: The Rescue of the Scarecrow
Kermit and Pepe were talking conversely as they walked down the road. ''H'okay, so what if ju don't survive, h'okay? Does that mean I get to be head Muppet, h'okay?'' Pepe yearned hopefully. ''No. If we don't come back alive, I'm gonna let either Gonzo or Fozzie be in control, I guess.'' he wondered. ''L-Let's not think about that.'' he stuttered. Pepe nodded and directed his attention to a corn field. He nudged Kermit in the elbow. ''I dunno 'out ju, but I'm gonna get some corns, h'okay!'' said Pepe eagerly. Kermit shrugged and walked into the field along with Pepe. Pepe climbed up a stalk and began nibbling on an ear of corn. A scarecrow stood nearby on a pole with a frantic look on his face as a crow picked at his green scarf covered neck. ''Would you mind getting off of me?'' the straw boy growled. The crow cawed twice and pecked harder at his neck. ''OW!! H-hey! Stop it!! That freaking hurts!!'' Kermit turned around and gaped at the scarecrow. He didn't like what he saw. Kermit grabbed a rock and chucked it at the crow, ending its breif life. The scarecrow watched it twitch on the ground. ''Are you okay?'' asked the frog. Scarecrow looked dazed. The one eye he had that was visible stared wide eyed. ''What? Oh, you meant me. It's a good thing you showed up when you did, cause I was gonna come off of this stupid old pole and... yeah thanks I owe you one. Name's Scarecrow.'' Scarecrow stuck out his hand forcefully and Kermit shook it. ''I'm Kermit. Kermit the Frog.'' he explained. ''Si, si, and I am Pepe the King Prawn, but you can call me anything you want, h'okay...'' sighed Pepe, obviously confusing Scarecrow for a girl because of his shaggy brown hair. Scarecrow scrutinized Pepe. ''Uh, I'm a dude...'' he mumbled. The prawn blushed nervously. ''Oh... sorry, h'okay...'' he apologized. Scarecrow nodded. ''Yeah, I'd laugh but the pain from this pole up my back is killing me. I'm the worst scarecrow ever... but what am I supposed to do? Find the Rainbow Connection and call it a day?'' he moped. Kermit shrugged. ''Well, I know alot about finding the Rainbow Connection. And you'll never find it stuck up on that pole. Here I'll get you down.'' Kermit climbed up a corn stalk and unfastened the strings on Scarecrow's arms. The boy fell to the ground with a thud, causing one of his arms to flop off. Pepe gasped and fell off of the stalk he was holding onto. Kermit picked it up and reaattached it to the straw boy. ''You are a mess, you know that?!'' he laughed as he helped the boy up. Scarecrow shook off the dust from the pollen on the ground and chuckled. ''Well, it would be easier if I only had a brain. All that's up in the old noggin is a pile of straw. I wish I knew... well... could know of... well... I just wish there was someone who could give me a brain!'' said the frustrated Scarecrow, trying to avoid the word 'know'. ''Hmmm...'' wondered Kermit. Pepe intervened. ''Oh no! We are NOT going to pick up every Tom, Jim, and Carlos we see on the road h'okay! This journey is about ju going home and me getting LOTS of monies h'okay!'' Scarecrow snorted. ''Please... my name is SCARECROW, not Tom, Jim, or Carlos.'' he huffed. Pepe rolled his eyes. ''See what I mean, h'okay?!'' Pepe hissed. Kermit shook his head. ''Aw c'mon, the poor child needs a brain! You want him to end up like Peaches?'' Kermit asked pleadingly. Pepe looked scared. ''Oh GOSH no, h'okay!'' Kermit nodded. He walked up to Scarecrow. ''Hey Scarecrow, if you come with us to the Wizard of Spand-Oz, I bet he can give you a brain.'' the frog suggested. Scarecrow's painted mouth rose into a smile. ''Really? If I had a brain... I wouldn't be an idiot! And I could do something that helps people!'' he cheered. Kermit smilled and giggled. ''Yeah! All we gotta do is go to Bikini City!'' Scarecrow's eyes... er, eye, lit up. ''You mean it's NAMED AFTER A SWIMSUIT?!?! Huh! I like it already!'' he exclaimed. Scarecrow followed after Kermit and Pepe continued walking down the road, with a smile that could light up the world.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 4: the Rescue of the Tin Woodsgirl
The three of them were still walking down the road. Kermit looked up to the towering Scarecrow. ''So Scarecrow... how did you end up on that stalk?'' he asked. Scarecrow shrugged and frowned. ''I've been up there for thirteen years. I was hung up thirteen years ago and the farmer forgot about me and left me there for my straw to rot.'' He held up a piece of straw from his hat that had turned a nasty brownish color for Kermit to see. ''See?'' Pepe grimaced and shook his head. ''So basically ju are like some type pf corpse made of straw, h'okay?'' he asked. Scarecrow shrugged again. ''I dunno. No brain, remember.'' he said flatly. Pepe looked over at Kermit. ''Do ju HAVE to pick up every deadbeats you see on the streets, h'okay?!'' Before Kermit could answer, a loud groaning sound came erupting from deep in the woods. Pepe jumped into Scarecrow's arms. Lost in confusion, Scarecrow dropped him abruptly. Kermit walked a little closer towards the woods. ''I think its coming from over here...'' he mumbled beckoning them to follow him. Scarecrow followed the little frog into the woods with Pepe clinging to one of his long, lanky legs. They walked around through the brush until they came across a sillohuete. It looked like a girl from their point of view, but it was impossible to tell. Kermit crept over to the sillohueted figure and brushed some dust off of its legs. ''TW...'' he muttered, repeating the two initials engraved on the leg. Scarecrow stepped forward. ''Wonder what that means...'' he mouthed. The figure started to groan and move a little. Kermit stepped back. Scarecrow put his hands on Kermit's shoulders as Pepe clung harder to Scarecrow's leg for dear life. An oilcan glinted in the sun peeking through the trees. Kermit picked it up. He glanced at Scarecrow, who just shrugged. Kermit shook nervously and began to oil the joints he saw around the mouth of the metallic person. The lips creaked and moved slowly. The head then turned along with the neck and limbs as the frog oiled them up. Surprisingly, the thing made of tin resembled GG in a weird sort of way. ''Whew... thanks frogman.'' she finally answered to him. Kermit shook her hand lightly as the two stepped closer. The tin one looked up at the Scarecrow. ''Hey, you kinda look like Jack Skellington...'' she wondered. Scarecrow raised an eyebrow. ''Anywho, name's TW... Whoa! That Scarecrow has a shrimp on his leg! Sweet!'' she cried. Pepe raised his head. ''King prawn...'' he stammered. Scarecrow pryed him off. ''So what's your name, ma'am?'' asked Kermit. ''TW. Stands for Tin Woodsgirl. You?'' ''I'm Kermit the Frog, this is Pepe the King Prawn, and this is Scarecrow.'' he answered. TW sighed sadly. ''Wow, you've got friends. I wish I had some friends or somethin'.'' TW longed. Pepe stepped forward. ''Ju don't have no friends? Weirdo...'' he scoffed. Kermit stamped Pepe's foot, causing him to yelp. ''Why don't you have any friends?'' he asked. TW sighed once more. ''I don't have a heart. Y'see, I'm a robot, and robots don't have hearts to love.'' she answered. Scarecrow let out an 'awww' and Pepe just went 'pffft'. Kermit held her cold hard hand. ''Well, Scarecrow's looking for brains, and Pepe and I just wanna go home... we're gonna see the Wizard of Spand-Oz!'' he told her with a bright happy smile. ''Maybe he can give ya a heart?'' Scarecrow intervened. TW computed the thought with her accelerated robot brain. ''Alright... I guess I'm with ya!'' Before Kermit could do his famous YAAAAAY!!, a dastardly moan erupted from the trees. Their branches turned into hands and arms and the grew angry, gnarled faces. Pepe started panicking. ''SWEET MARY!!!''
___________________________________________________
Chapter 5: When Trees Attack
The trees began to violently shake their branches, pelting the group with apples. ''But I'm allergic to the apple-fruits, h'okay!!'' Pepe wailed, covering his face. Scarecrow threw himself over the other three to protect them. Kermit removed his hands from his eyes. ''Scarecrow! You're hurting yourself, stop it!'' he worried. Scarecrow shot him a reassuring smirk. ''You kidding? My body's made of straw! This don't hurt at all!'' he beamed. As an apple flew past his head, Scarecrow's smile disappeared. He nudged Pepe. ''Pepe, climb up to my head and unfasten the string around it, then hand it to me.'' he commanded. ''JU WANT ME TO TAKE OFF JOUR HEAD?!?!'' Pepe shrilled. Scarecrow glared at him wildly. ''Just do it!!!'' Pepe climbed up the Scarecrow and unfastened the string that held his head to his straw body. He handed the scarecrow's head to its body. Scarecrow stopped protecting them and stepped back, with his head LITERALLY in his hands. ''What'sa matter? Don't wanna LOSE YOUR HEAD!!'' He threw his head at a tree, knocking it out. The body scrambled over to pick up the head. Scarecrow attempted to roll. ''Over here, stupid!'' he insulted the body. It picked his head up and fastened it back on. Kermit's lip twitched. ''Now THAT'S creepy...'' he murmurred in a hoarse voice. The tree Scarecrow had hit sprang back up and nailed him in the head with a banjo that it shook out of its leaves. Scarecrow went flying through the air and landed on Pepe. Kermit grabbed the banjo and tuned it. "I think I know what I gotta do!" Kermit said, mustering up all his might. He grabbed the banjo in one hand and started running at the trees, yelling the Indian's signature WOLOOLOOLOOOLOOO!!! As soon as Kermit was about to hit the tree, he stopped in thin air and started playing the Rainbow Connection. The trees fell silent and watched him for a minute, only to grab the banjo and break it in half. Kermit stepped back, shaking. ''I-I guess you didn't like that one, eheheh... RUN!!'' Kermit ran back screaming. TW lept into the air with her axe as a tree shot a fiddle from its branches. Pepe's eyes widened. ''WHAT KIND OF GOD FORSAKEN TREES ARE THESE, H'OKAY?!'' he yelled. Scarecrow picked up the fiddle and started playing in a hicktown country style as TW blew the trees to smithereens. Wood was flying everywhere as she got at them. Sap flew through the air like fresh blood on a battlefield. Kermit watched in awe until Scarecrow grabbed him by the shoulder, rodeo style. ''Spin around, put on a show! Nothin' gets ya pumpin' like a rodeo! Take some names and show some CLASS! Cut the trees and kick some-'' ''BUTT!'' interrupted Kermit. Scarecrow shrugged and kept playing. The combination of axes and fiddles was beautiful. The bow slid lightly across the last string as TW demolished her last victim. A branch inadverdently nailed Pepe in the head. Kermit was smacked square in the gut with an apple. In order to retalliate, Scarecrow threw his fiddle at the tree, causing it to explode. ''WHOO!'' TW cheered throwing Pepe in the air, leaving him screaming until he came back down. Scarecrow high-fived her. ''Now THAT'S what I call a hoedown! YEAAAHHHH!!!'' he trilled joyfully. Kermit sighed in relief. ''Well THAT'S taken care of. Let's get back on the road...'' he suggested, pointing to the road. TW and Scarecrow shrugged and followed after the Muppet. Pepe came along also. As they were walking, Scarecrow smelled something foul. He crinkled his painted nose and covered it. ''Whoo wee! Who cut the d**n cheese?! I mean BARNACLES that reeks!'' he complained. Kermit stared at her blankly and blinked. Scarecrow looked as if he was rolling his eyes; hard to tell considering no one could actually SEE ONE OF THEM. ''Don't give me that look Kermit! It couldn't have been me or TW, we ain't even human!'' Pepe blushed and twiddled his thumbs. ''Sorry... I TOLD ju I was allergic to the apple fruits, h'okay...''
___________________________________________________
Chapter 6: the Cowardly Lioness
The road began to get uneven and hard as they walked along. Scarecrow fell through gaps in the road several times, causing everyone else to rescue him and stitch him back together. But they didn't seem to mind. Kermit's flippered feet grew tired and achey through the silver Converses on his feet. ''Man, my feet are KILLING me. I gotta relax...'' he muttered. ''Yeah...'' said everyone else in unison. They walked for at least fifteen more minutes until they came to a forest full of abandoned logs. They all found one long enough for all of them and plopped down. Kermit unlaced the shoes and moved his flippers around a little. ''Okay, they can make a talking scarecrow, a tin woodsgirl, and a trailer land on a witch but they CAN'T make a comfortable magic sneaker? Go figure.'' said TW. Kermit nodded agreeingly. ''I feel you on that.'' Pepe scooted over on the log, sitting on something furry. ''Ow!'' cried out a female voice. Everyone looked around. ''D'you guys hear that?'' asked TW. Pepe rose into the air on an orange tail. ''Err, guys...'' he trembled. A lioness showed her face from behind the treee. She looked strikingly like Peaches, except for her feline features. ''AAAH! It's a SHRIMP!'' she cried. Pepe leaned in closer. ''No, prawn.'' he corrected. ''Oh, prawn... AAHHHHHH! PRAAAAAAAAWN!!!'' the lioness screamed. Pepe was still clinging to her tail as it was waved around frantically. Everyone watched as the lioness's tail carried around the screaming prawn. Scarecrow nudged them to get up. Kermit growled and held up one of his shoes warningly. ''Get your tail off my prawn!'' he threatened. The lion stopped and threw Pepe onto TW, knocking her off the log. The female lion hid behind a tree. ''Please don't hurt me! I'll be good, I promise!'' she squealed. TW got up and scoffed. ''Well look at you! Queen of the Beasts, and you've got the moxie of a pillbug!'' she laughed. Scarecrow nudged her. ''TW, don't be rude.'' he said through gritted teeth. Kermit walked up to the lioness. ''What's your name?'' he asked kindly. She hid even farther behind the tree. ''L-L-Lion...'' she cowered, now looking Kermit full in the face. Lion was relived when she found it he was just a cute green frog. ''Sorry, I just don't have too much courage in me...'' she replied sadly. Kermit frowned. He showed pity for the lioness. ''Aww, don't feel bad...'' he replied stroking her paw. Scarecrow walked over. ''Yeah! So what if you're not so brave? I'm not so smart!" he reassured her. TW nodded. ''Yeah, and I've got so little heart I could cry.'' Pepe nodded also. ''Si, and I'm so mindblowingly sexy it hurts.'' he said beating his chest a little. Lion raised an eyebrow. Kermit leaned over to her ear. ''Don't believe him, he's just a king prawn.'' he whispered. ''Do we call him king?'' she whispered back. Scarecrow nodded 'no'. ''But back to the matter at hand,'' interupted TW. Kermit agreed by nodding. ''Lion, we're going to the Wizard of Spand-Oz to ask for help, would you like to come and get some bravery?'' asked Scarecrow, reassuredly holding her hand. Lion pulled away. ''Your hands are all strawy and scratchy... but I guess I'll go! Even though it's kind of frightening.'' she answered. TW laughed. ''Then it's settled! We're back on the road!" Everyone but Kermit left the log and continued. He heaved an exhausted sigh and laced up the shoes as he followed his other cohorts.
___________________________________________________
Chapter 7: On the Road Again!
Over last night, they had traveled far. Of course they stopped to eat and to sleep for the, but this particular night would sure be eventful for Kermit and friends. All of them were walking for about an hour when they came to a hault at a great wide log. The log crossed a dangerous waterfall and linked to the forest across. Kermit frowned. ''What do we do now? Cross it?'' he suggested. Before they could answer, the frog was already balancing himself on the log and walking across. Everyone was shouting 'no!' and 'you won't make it!' or 'come on back!'. Scarecrow just shot him a worried look. ''Be careful, Kermit!'' he called. The little green frog stepped down and landed safely on the land on the other side. ''YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!'' yelled Kermit as he flailed his arms around. ''C'mon Pepe!'' Pepe shrugged and scuttled across the log in a few seconds long. It was easy for him because he had four arms and two legs. TW patted Scarecrow on the back. ''Okay, you go next StrawBoy.'' she joked. He nodded and balanced on the log. After a few shaky steps and catching himself from behind, he made it with TW right behind him. As soon as they reached the other side, everyone high-fived. Lion stepped back a little. She was so afraid to fall off that she was frozen with fear. Kermit stood on Scarecrow's shoulders. ''C'mon Lion, you can do this!'' he reassured her. Lion gulped and began walking slowly on the log. After a few creaks from the log she stopped halfway. Lion clung to her tail. ''Guys I can't do this! I can't move!''she panicked. Everyone continued cheering her on, but she wouldn't budge. TW stepped onto the log. ''I'm going out. If I don't come back, tell Doctor Who I love him!'' she yelled over the rapids. TW neared the timid lion. ''Don't be afraid. We'll take this one step at a time! Now let go of your tail and grabmy hand.'' she soothed to the lion. Lion slowly dropped her tail and clutched the tin girl's cold hard hand. TW led her across the log with a few soothing words and soon enough, they made it through! There was cheering and laughing and arm flailing and random things exploding! Scarecrow and Pepe were launched into the air by one of the random explosions, but no one really cared. As they were about to continue on the road they heard jazz music erupting from... something... Lion pointed over to a brightly lit building surrounded by poppies of red and gold hues and tinges. ''It's coming from over there. Come on!'' Lion said. All of them crept carefully into the building to find out that the building was a nightclub! There were people sleeping on tables and drinks overturned at bars. A band similar to the SpongeBob gang was playing jazz and scat music. An usher pulled them to a table and sat them down. The table had a large vase of poppies in the middle of it. Scarecrow looked around. ''Y'know, if I had a brain I could find out why it's fun to get all drunk and tipsy at a nightclub.'' he stated randomly. TW raised an antennae from the top of her head like an internet signal finder. ''According to my databases, these poppies make people fall asleep, appparently forever if not taken away from the poppies.'' she informed them. ''Pssh.'' scoffed Lion. ''How could a stupid little flower-ZZZZZZ....'' And she fell to the floor in a daze. Scarecrow and TW exchanged shocked glances. TW got down on the floor and nudged the lion repeatedly. ''Lion? Lion?!" she screamed frantically. She got back up and sat down with a frightened gaze. Kermit yawned and waved his hand absentmindedly. ''Eh... he's fine... y'know what?... We should just stay here...'' Kermit yawned again. ''Where it's so... relaxing!...'' He fell to the floor, sleeping. Scarecrow nudged Kermit repeatedly and nervously. ''Kermit? Kermit! KERMIT?!?! WHY WON'T HE WAKE UP?!'' he cried panic-stricken. TW just repeated 'I don't know' over and over to his questions. Pepe stumbled in holding a toilet roll. ''The bathrooms here are so comfortables, h'okay...'' And Pepe fell asleep also. Scarecrow got up. ''It's the poppies!'' Scarecrow realized. TW and he were not affected because they are made artificially not of human (or in this case frog and prawn) flesh and blood, of course. C'mon let's get Pepe out of here!'' Scarecrow told TW. Both of them grabbed one side of Pepe and carried him away. As they got out of the club, they dropped Pepe on the grass. ''What do we do now?'' asked TW. Scarecrow shrugged. ''I don't know! But we can't get Kermit and Lion out of there!'' TW looked confused. ''Wait, we can get Kermit out of there, he's only like two feet tall and few ounces of felt.'' she corrected. Scarecrow looked around and whispered to TW. ''Yes, I'm aware of that, except that the readers of this cruddy story want drama, and besides, we gotta go by the book.'' he told her as he looked out at YOU; the reader. TW nodded and understood. Pepe aroused himself barely. He pulled Scarecrow close to him as if he were drunk. ''Listen to me, h'okay... there's this whistle... in my... pocket. Take it and... blow.. it... h'okay...'' Pepe explained, swaying side to side as he gave Scarecrow the whistle. He shrugged and puffed on the whistle. The sound of a thousand tiny feet came rampaging in. The old Spongekin with the beard who had given Pepe the whistle stepped forward. ''What is wrong?'' he asked. ''Lion and Kermit are trapped in there! Poppy exposure!'' TW cried. The Spongekins went in two shakes of a lamb's tail and came out with Kermit and Lion in their arms. They all giggled shrilly and dissappeared with a pop. Kermit woke up finally. ''Oh... what happened?'' he asked groggily. TW and Scarecrow smiled at each other. ''Nothing.'' they said in unison. Lion awoke with smacking her lips. ''What'd I miss?'' she took one glance at Pepe. ''AHH! PRAWN!'' And Lion fainted again. TW busted out laughing while everyone else shook their heads. They got away from the club as fast as possible, vowing to never set foot in it ever again.
___________________________________________________
THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EPIC!!! MOAR PLZ!!!
Ain't they cute!?
I LOVE IT. 
I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!
i login every so often